Empty Frames
October 7th, 2009 @ 8:42 pm |
Filed: My glamourous life, Pomdering | Tags:
Several months ago, I bought picture frames engraved with the word “Sisters.” I do this occassionally - pick up matching items to give to my three younger sisters to symbolize our sisterly bond.
Though we fought (really, physically, emotionally fought like cats and dogs) through out childhood, as we matured we grew really close. We bought sister rings on our Griswold family vacation. We took crazy photos at random locations on another trip through the South. We’ve helped each other move and stood beside our sister as she said “I do.” The night before S got married, we all slept together on our parents’ pull out sofa bed. We had cookie making parties and have matching footie pajamas.
So I bought these picture frames months ago hoping that in the very near future we would have another picture-perfect opportunity we could capture on film (or digital) that I could commit to photo paper and seal behind glass. But it’s been months, more than 12 of them, since the four of us have had a happy, carefree, sisterly moment together. We haven’t spent a holiday together since Easter 2008, the day before S walked out on her husband and chose a new path in life. She has a new family now; new friends, a new man, a new baby. Because of the man’s history with my family, either he won’t come around or she won’t bring him around. So she chooses him, even though he’s unworthy of her.
Then I think, who am I to judge her? Him? Why can’t I just support her and love her, decisions and all? I just want my sister back. I want more photogenic moments. I want to eat Thanksgiving dinner beside her. I want to send wrapping paper flying through the air on Christmas Day beside her. I want to see my nephews - those adorable, lovable baby boys who own my heart - dressed in Halloween costumes. I want, I want, I want to be a happy family again. I need to be a good sister and just accept her and her decisions because I think that’s what she needs.
A few days ago I found the forgotten empty frames still wrapped in the Kohl’s bag. I cried.
October 9th, 2009 @ 10:59 am
Oh My! It is SO HARD to support and love our siblings regardless of whatever decisions they are making… and it seems like we’re being selfish and controlling, but really, we just want what’s best for them. Maybe by being there for her- in agreement of choices or not- she will see where you are coming from
p.s. There will be a little somthin-somethin for you at my blog later today… it isn’t the prettiest, but it has good intentions
November 2nd, 2009 @ 4:55 am
oh that is so hard.
hopefully, someday your sister and her man will feel comfortable coming to family functions. until then, i guess, hold on to those picture frames.